Monday, September 30, 2013

Case Study No. 1020: Constance MacDonald

Constance's Library Primer
0:41
Head librarian Constance MacDonald dishes on how to maximize your library experience
Tags: books comedy Constance librarian Olson Kristen request book library humor strict forms Funny Humour
Added: 1 year ago
From: artandsoulko
Views: 21

[scene opens with a female librarian (short brown hair, black sweater, white blouse) speaking directly to the camera]
CONSTANCE: The book request form ...
[cut to a shot of the librarian holding up a piece of paper, entitled "Book Request Form"]
CONSTANCE: There are five fields.
[she points to the title (written in bold) at the top of the paper]
CONSTANCE: There's a title.
[cut to the librarian holding a "completed" book request form, featuring a dog and a flower drawn in crayon]
CONSTANCE: Why can't the adults figure this out?
[cut to another shot of the librarian speaking directly to the camera]
CONSTANCE: I love forms!
[cut to another shot of the librarian speaking directly to the camera]
CONSTANCE: In the talking areas, you can talk to me. Talk to me in the talking areas of the library.
[cut to another shot of the librarian speaking directly to the camera]
CONSTANCE: Chew some gum ... for god's sake. Freshen your breath.
[cut to another shot of the librarian speaking directly to the camera]
CONSTANCE: It's your fault ... that you didn't return the book on time.
[cut to another shot of the librarian speaking directly to the camera]
CONSTANCE: My name is Constance MacDonald ... "Old Lady MacDonald?" That's all you can come up with?
[cut to another shot of the librarian holding up a blank book request form]
CONSTANCE: [whispers] It's very simple ...
[the screen cuts to black, as "kristenolson dot com, copyright 2011 Kristen Olson" appears on screen]

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